July 25, 2008

Pine Tar Anniversary

Here is to George Brett for the best baseball blow-up of my childhood. I remember watching the highlights of this on This Week in Baseball and laughing it up with my dad. This was one of the funniest things I had ever seen on a baseball field. I always wondered who would have won a fight between Brett and McClelland if they had let them go at it. I'd put my money on Brett he was tough as nails and a scrapper. It figures it was the Yankees who screwed Brett. Typical disgusting New York snakes.



Kudos for the Peroia Chiefs vs. Dayton Dragons for honoring the memory of Geroge's pinetar incident with a brawl of their own.

July 24, 2008

E.C.W. Honarable Mentions

Here are some honarable mentions that didn't make it into my ECW top 10. I also have to mention those who didn't even make this column. Shane Douglas, Raven, Too Cold Scorpio, Chris Benoit, Dean Malenko, Mike Awesome, Referee John Finnigan, and all the others who made ECW a unique experience for wrestling fans. Anyway here are 5 honarable mentions.

5) Balls Mahoney and Axl Rotten
You had to love ECW because of guys like Balls Mahoney and Axl Rotten. Absolute hack wrestlers along the lines of Repo Man who just knew how to brawl and take punishmnet. I always loved how Balls would give someone the ten punch and the crowd would shout "BALLS, BALLS" with every punch.
Balls n Axl vs. The Baldies (New Jack steals the show)


Shout out to Axl's brother Ian Rotten.


Balls FLAMING TABLE!


4)The B.W.O (Blue World Order) Stevie Richards, The Blue Meanie, & Super Nova
Stevie and the Blue Meanie took their shtick to new heights with the B.W.O they were great comic relief. Plus making fun of the whole N.W.O thing was priceless.

B.W.O as Kiss (Enter The SANDman!)


3) Joel GERTner
While most ring men Howard Finkle etc. were purley voices. Joel Gertner took ring hype to a new level. "The Quintessential Stub Muffin"

Best of GERTner!


2)Francine vs. Beulah
They originated catfights or at least the wrestling tradition of catfights. Men everywhere will forever owe them.

CAT FIGHT!


Dreamer Pie Driver


1) Joey Styles
One man color commentary and play by play. One key phrase "OH MY GOD!" ECW didn't mean more to anyone then styles. If you watched ECW you had to love his work.

Scaffold Match OMG


Styles "Cat Fight!"


One night Stand

The Ass Kicking Tour Begins

The Patriots are back in camp and all their 2008 Draftees are signed. Mayo signed today which is great news because he will need all the time he can get to learn Belichick's bible.

There is a lot riding on this year for the Pats in order to shut up the haters and regain the (Belichick) Lombari trophy. I'm going to have to say this year will be better than last year due to the fact the Pats are going to be underestimated. How are they underestimated you say after going 16-0 in the regular season? Well from what people tell me they lost in the Super Bowl. Apparently I have no recolection of the date of 2/3/08.

My reasoning is based on the fact that the following has happened:

  1. the NFL and Roger G slapped them in the face,
  2. A fat bastard at the local papers spread lies about them,
  3. A Senator got his rocks off chasing a white whale and
  4. The Giants and New York in general have been taunting the Pats

Now this is a team that thrives on motivation and disrespect. Just ask Rodney Harrison how he's been disrespected and doubted his whole life. You don't want to doubt the Pats because they will beat it into you that they are the best franchise in the history of the NFL. Plus Brady is talking about feeling 21 again. Now I remember what 21 felt like and believe me your balls are about as big as they can be at 21. You think Brady forced passes into Moss into double and triple man coverage, well get ready for him to start punting balls to Moss with his dick. Just listen to "The Man"

July 23, 2008

E.C.W!

This video below of chairs being thrown endlessly into a wrestling ring prompted me to do something that is long over due. Honor my adolescent heros from Extreme Championship Wrestling a.k.a. E.C.W. Plus our website is down at work and I'm bored.

glumbert - Wrestlers Ask For A Chair - Get 300!


Now I was raised on the WWF's Hulkster, Andre the Giant, and The Macho Man "Ohhhhhhhh Yeah!" as a youth. My penchant for wrestling was taken to another level once I laid eyes apon E.C.W. Now mind you watching E.C.W. tapings wasn't easy living in Maine. The only stations it was on were in the New York Philly area and you had to order the tapes through the mail. My buddy Fish was the first to turn my attention to the brutally raw E.C.W. style and I was hooked from the begining. Seeing wrestlers like Taz, Sabu, Sandman, and Tommy Dreamer leave it all in the ring was something special. I guess I'm a dork for liking wrestling or maybe it was just something that I related to as a teen. Unfortunately E.C.W. was poorly run into the ground by Paul E. Dangerously and has been bastardized by Vince McMahon ever since.

So I will now honor the E.C.W. with a top ten of E.C.W wrestlers and tag teams along with some side commentary.

#10 - Public Enemy
They had some success in WCW but they were a staple of E.C.W. tag competition. They were not very skilled but thrived on being able to take punishment and entertain the E.C.W. faithful.


Side Note:
"Holy Sh*t" moments. The E.C.W. arena crowds were the best with the chants and "Holy Sh*t" was a classic one. Great New Jack moments at 2:40 & 2:53. Great chant at the end.


#9 - Terry Funk
The Funker had a legendary wrestling career before he stepped into the world of hardcore wrestling, but he was made for two things ECW and Barbed Wire matches.


#8 - The Eliminators (Saturn and Kronus)
Saturn and Kronus were a solid tag team with a devastating finisher "Total Elimination".


#7 - The Dudley Boys (Bubba Ray and Devon)
While they enjoyed great success in the WWF or whatever they call it now the Dudleys were an ECW brainchild. A traveling sales man fathered this brood of illegitimate children and the world was better for it. "My name is Buh Buh Buhhh"
Flaming tables


#6 - Sandman
Chain smoking beer drinking ass kicking. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Drink

Smoke


Side Note: 911 evey now and then a match would be so awful that 911, a roadie who helped assemble the ring for ECW, would have to lay down the law with a nasty choke slam. He would choke slam anyone in his way.
Here comes 9-1-1!


#5 - Tommy Dreamer
Dreamer was the Hulk Hogan of ECW the fans loved him even though he wasn't a great wrestler. He was there from day one and was part of some of the biggest matches in ECW history. This match explains it all "The Scaffold Match".


#4 - TAZ
Taz was the "human suplex machine" didn't have the size to make it in the big leagues but found his nitch in ECW. Easily one of the most fundamentaly sound wrestlers in ECW he didn't excel with chair shots, but he was a buzz saw and had a great career as a heal to Sabu, Dreamer, and Rob Van Dam. Nobody gave a suplex with the viciousness of Taz.
Beat me if you can. Survive if I let you!


#3 - Rob Van Dam
From the later generation of ECW. Was the best wrestler around when ECW hit it big. Had some legendary matches with Sabu and Jerry Lyn. Easily the most athletic wrestler I've seen.
RVD vs. Jerry Lynn vol. 1


Van Daminator!


RVD tribute



#2 The Gangstas (New Jack and Mustafa)
New Jack epitomized hard core. New Jack always had a trash can of goodies and an appitite for destroying his opponent. Mustafa was always good for going through a table or for getting chair shot.


Great Styles OMG!




#1 - SABU!
This guy was the craziest thing to ever hit the wrestling world. I still don't think he is human. There is no way a human could survive the punishment Sabu delt out, received, or self inflicted.


Nice Tribute poor quality


Note: Honarable Mentions will follow in my next post.

West SYDE!

Sox have taken the road woes to the left coast. The West Side has always been tough on the Sox during the regular season due to travel and jet lag. No worries we all know how it goes when the playoff Sox take it to the laid back Cali teams (see picture to jog your memory). Coming back at a 3-3 .500 is all you can ask after getting swept in Anaheim and taking the last two from the Mariners. It also doesn't help matters that the Yanks are coming to town on a roll this weekend winners of their last five and then the Halos come back to beantown fresh off sweeping the Sox in their last three games. These two series are going to be huge because the Sox have to make a statement against both teams for the postseason. They have to put the Yanks in their place and cool their resurgence and let the Angles know they are still the team to beat in the AL. These are both attainable goals as long as the Sox keep playing solid defense, get 6-7 solid innings from the starters, and Manny (keeps his yapper shut so the media can't stir up anymore dirt) stays magma hot.

The middle innings pitching has been a concern and the trade deadline looms, but I don't see the Sox making a big move after last year's Gagne debacle. They will probably test some of the young guys Hansen, Mastersen, and maybe Bowden to fill that need. Theo may see a guy like Demaso Marte of the Pirates as a good pick-up, but the Pirates will likely want too much in return. Brian Fuentes has been another rumored reliever to land on the Sox, but the Rox want Bucholz plus some draft chips, not happening. I see it as a positive that the only big question mark the Sox have is fixable. At this point in the season someone could emerge like Delcarmen Okajima and right his troubles. With names/ arms like that I see Theo being content to play it out with what we have and count Papi as the big shot in the arm for the playoff push. While it is still early the Sox could use some padding on the Yanks in the AL East standings.

These next two series could be big for the Sox momentum and I see August as an easy month which includes series with the tanking A's, K.C, Pale Hoes, Rangers, Jay's, O's, Jays, Yanks, and White Sox. Looks to be at least a 5-10 game win streak in there and should be a month where the Sox win at least 75% of those games. It seems like the Sox should be able to catch the Rays easily and take 1st back. The Yanks need to be put away and all will be well in Beantown. Remember the days where you would dread the August swoon of the Sox or the September slide? Like clock work they would blow some easy games and have to scrounge up some tough wins in the Brox in late summer.




Here's to seeing the Sox in the playoffs. Wake me when it all begins.









Teddy Ballgame

Teddy Ballgame
#9 on the field #1 in our hearts.

Simmons